Your Next Place

By Franklin Schneider

I'm not usually one to laud the glory of bygone eras (if only because I can't stand to admit that I missed out on something), but this house definitely seemed to embody a sort of ideal. Built in 1940 (which is in that sweet spot right after technology to a reasonably advanced degree but before everything went to total and utter crap), it seemed to combine the class and subtlety of the classic with the clean lines and open spaces of the contemporary. Also, it had a ton of chandeliers. I'm a firm believer that you can never have too many chandeliers. (True story: when I was growing up, my grandparents had an RV with a chandelier in it. And you'll never convince me that it didn't look fantastic.)


A beautiful whitewashed brick home, you walk up a long sloping set of stairs bordered by a landscaped terrace and enter into the airy center of the home. All the main public rooms branch off this entryway; the living room is huge and flooded with light, and there's a beautiful formal dining room (loved the dark walls) as well as a cozier breakfast room off the (very fine) kitchen. Both have fireplaces, so when your significant other forgets (again) that you don't like onions in your stir-fry, instead of passive-aggressively picking out individual onions, you can just fling it, plate and all, into the fire. Honesty is the foundation of all lasting relationships.

Upstairs are the three bedrooms. The master suite is especially masterful, and sweet (wordplay!), with a large, chandelier-lit (of course) bedroom and a palatial bathroom that's far too elegant for the kind of disgusting things you do in there. The other bedrooms are spacious and finely detailed and just generally so classy that I'm quite sure that if I moved in and tried to put my cigarette-burned IKEA chair and unsheeted twin mattress in there, they'd spit them back into the hallway like someone who just noticed a dead mouse floating in their soda. There's also a gorgeous woodsy yard in back, with a small bluestone patio, and an attached two car garage. What could be more American than actually driving your cars into your house?

3715 49th St. NW
3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms
$1,775,000