Wednesday, August 01, 2012

Your Next Place

This house has a rooftop pool.  Not the cleverest opener, I admit, but I feel like we can agree that this fact deserves top billing.  I'd live in a hospital for the criminally insane if it had a rooftop pool.  I'd even live with my parents if they had a rooftop pool.  (Which is sort of another way of saying I'd live in a hospital for the criminally insane.  Though perhaps that's a tad unfair - hospital for the criminally annoying, maybe.)

But even aside from the rooftop pool, this house is one-in-a-million.  Originally two carriage houses, they've been combined into a spectacular, yawning, four-bedroom, five-bathroom living space.  The atrium-like living room is an incredible two stories tall; if you think the silence between you and your significant other during commercial breaks is awkward now, in your normal apartment, just wait until you live here.  The awkwardness will grow to epic proportions!

The dining room and kitchen also sport 20+ foot ceilings, as well as all the high-end finishes you'd expect from a house of this caliber; recessed lighting, stainless steel appliances, hardwood floors, magical phone booth.  Yes, you read that right.  There's a bright red British-style phone booth that magically moves up and down between levels, ie. an elevator, if you insist on being all boring and unmagical about things.  Think of it this way, you'd definitely be the only one of your friends who had a whimsical elevator, unless you're friends with, like, Willy Wonka.

There are three decks up top (yes, three), and each of the four bedrooms features an en-suite bathroom; just a short drunken crawl from toilet to bed!  (Or, since no one else shares your bathroom, just collapse right there on the bathroom floor and sleep it off.  Just try to slide a towel under your face as you lose consciousness, or you'll have the tile-grid imprinted on your cheek the next morning, and everyone at brunch will ridicule you when you claim that it's "just eczema."  I speak here from experience.)

2220 Q Street NW
4 Bedrooms, 5 Baths


Anonymous said...

Between the phone booth elevator, the pool table in the LR, and the actual pool on the roof, I'm guessing the DC version of Justin Bieber renovated this house.

Tough sell since there aren't many millionaire teenage boys in Washington.

Anonymous said...

absolutely hideous and incredibly tacky. It's like a child's dream house that was thought up while running on a treadmill at Results' gym....

oh wait, doesn't the owner of Results' live here? ;)

Anonymous said...

Biz Markie Celebrity House Hunter:

House #2

Anonymous said...

I've seen this place. The owner deserves major credit for turning a rat-trap garage into a hip, useful, bright, happy space. It is a rare piece of creativity for too-staid DC, a fun and comfortable place to host and entertain.

Sorry for you who want a living room with Harvard Classics on shelves and C-SPAN playing on the big screen (yawn)

Anonymous said...

If I had $25 million, I'd buy this in a heartbeat.

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